Penelope Cruz: Pirates of The Caribbean: On Stranger's Tides Premiere

Hey guys! So today, with some help from Miss Penelope, I'm going to teach y'all some literature. And today we're going to learn about PLOT.

Novel and short stories always start with EXPOSITION. In exposition, the characters in the novel/short story are introduced. Like what Penelope did here.

POTC: On Stranger's Tides Disneyland's premiere in Marchesa.

This is Penelope INTRODUCING herself. She says, "Hi, or hola guys! This is me, Penelope. Yes, I am married and yes I was pregnant and yes I've became a pirate. But I am still ME. And just so you won't forget me, I, here, wear the same thing I wore for the last ten years. Like the one I wore to the MET and the Golden Globes. Remember me now? Of course you do!"

See? Introduction. Thanks Miss Penelope.

Now after exposition, we have RISING ACTIONS. Rising actions usually starts with a conflict.

In Emilio Pucci at the Moscow premiere.

As Miss Penelope demonstrates here, she's having a CONFLICT. She don't know if she wanted to stay with black or went with another color. This can be seen from her wardrobe choice: black dress with silver embellishments. Not sure about the big bow though. Maybe there's an 18th century housewife inside her that's struggling to get out. I'd say that's an INTERNAL CONFLICTS.

In this phase, the character always find their goal and begin to work towards it. For example:

In Givenchy Couture at the London premiere.

Hmm... Not sure about this one, Miss P. If the goal is to show the whole world your boobs are too big you can't even fully zip your dress than you have pretty much achieved it. But no.. We've just reached the second phase. This is not the end. Bad example, I'd say. As for the dress, Miss P, leave it to the less errrrr fortunate who don't have a pair of great assets on'em. Next example!

In Marchesa at the Cannes premiere of POTC: On Stranger's Tides.

Now it's clear. She's trying to break out from her all-black-mermaid-dress cocoon! How can I not see that before? See? That tulle on the skirt is a metaphor. A symbolism. That she has almost break out of the cocoon. Hmm... As for the dress, great embellishments, the tulle sucks, the zipper on the back looks odd but overall she looks kinda gorgeous. Don't worry, honey. You're so near. Because...

..in the end of this phase, you'll overcome all this probs.

In Stella Mccartney at Cannes's photocall.

Job well done, my dear. Well the bust part seems a little off but who cares about that when you look this gorgeous? Amyrite, Miss Penelope?

We proceed to the next stage which is the CLIMAX. Well climax is the turning point of the story, where the main character makes a big decision which defines the outcome of this story and who they are as a person. The protagonist had finally cleared away the preliminary barriers and ready to engage with the adversary. The struggle results with either the character winning or losing. And in the case of Miss Penelope here..

Wearing Armani Prive at the Munich premiere of the film.

....it's an absolute WIN.

Btw, people called mouth orgasm 'mouthgasm' so what do you call 'fashion orgasm'? 'Fashgasm'?

Anyway, lets move on to the last part which is the FALLING ACTION and RESOLUTION. Well lets just say all that excitement and amusement and enjoyment and other words that indicates 'fun', ENDS here.

At the Madrid premiere in Hakaan.

No honey, it's not just a jumpsuit. It's an ugly and unflattering and baggy and BLACK jumpsuit. Tsk tsk tsk..

At Madrid premiere in Armani Prive.

Yes, Miss Penelope. I know I'm a boring teacher. But you can just SAY it instead of wearing a night gown as a symbolism. Geez.

Well, I end our class for today. And I surely wish to see more of 'climax Penelope' anytime soon. Wait. That doesn't sound right...

(ps: Don't we all wish our teacher is as hot as Miss Penelope here?)