Fashion: Freida Pinto in Antonio Berardi

Hye y'all! I'm back, y'all!

And hey y'all!!

Freida Pinto in Antonio Berardi at the LA premiere of her movie, The Immortals.

This is Freida Pinto y'all! And her womb is so precious she decided to protect it with metal armor!

And did she wet herself while sitting y'all? Or did she have to slide trough muddy terrain to get there? Your calls, y'all!!

I'm so excited I'm back, y'alls!!

Fashion: Selena Gomez at the 'Abduction' Premiere (with a little bit, actually, a lot of random shit)

"Oh, wow! How supportive! Selena Gomez is attending her ex, Taylor Lautner's movie premiere, Abduction. A story about how finding out that you're adopted can turn you from Jacob Black to Jason Bourne. Well, maybe Twilight could be more interesting if Jacob Black IS actually a secret agent. Just sayin'. Errrr.. Look! Selena Gomez being supportive guys! Look!"

Really... Supportive, huh? Lets read her body language then..

Well, this is "Oh, hey guys. Didn't see you there... Yeah... I'm just another normally adorable Disney's star attending her ex's movie premiere. See? One hand in my pocket, the cross-legged pose, simple black cute sequined top with an age-appropriate and not too provocatively sexy miniskirt with my natural makeups and my laundry hair. See? I'm chill. Nothing to worry here."

"Hmmph! These bunch of stupidos. What do they know? See this Taylor motherf**kers? This earrings are symbols of me turning over a new leaf and making it big in Hollywood after I date that stupid kid. See how the gold symbolize wealth and the money I made? And black? This black is a sign of hatred. I hate you! Thank God I succeeded in convincing that stupid blonde, Taylor not-Lautner (duh, you're not blonde and you should never be. Well, actually if being blonde will make you look stupid then be it then.) to write a song about you to make you look bad. HAHAHA. And this... this makeup... and this hair... is because I remember how much you like me... without any makeups on. And remember that time when you got caught in the tanning machine and then I have to help you out and then we have a great laugh about it and then... and then..... those sweet ol' times...."

"And that time when we go on a picnic and a bee stung my lips and that time when..... Wait. Why is HE here?"

"Fuck! Gimme a break, God! Can't I go anywhere for a second WITHOUT this guy following me around? Geez!"

" GULP. Maybe if I tiptoed my way outa here he wouldn't noticed me coming here without his permi...."

Bieber: Oh, honey, baby, baby, baby ouh.... Whatcha doin' here gal... I thought you said you're going to celebrate your friend's birthday party at that ice-cream place. OUR favorite ice-cream place.

Selena: I don't even like ice-cream, you insensitive freak.

Bieber: What do you say just now, my little one less lonely girl in the world?

Selena: Errr... No... I.... Errrr... No.... Like.... You know... Errr... Hangout... Like.... Yeah....

Bieber: Follow me now or I'll cut your allowance and date Demi Lovato or Taylor Swift and make'em more famous than you, bitch.

Selena: UGH! Fuck my life!

Bieber: No worry my gal, no matter where cha goin', I'll always be right next to yah!

Fashion: The Best of July

There's not much f**ked up red carpet moment this month (I don't know, even Xtina's looking kinda good) except the occasional fashion misses from the Kardashian sisters and a few Hollywood young starlet. So not a lot of bitchery can be done this month... Sigh...

Anyway. There are a few looks that, to me, was the best look of July.

Eugina Silva in Armani Prive

Eugina Silva at the Elle 25th Anniversary Award.

Bold choice of dress and bold choice of accessories. What's not to love? My favorite of this month.

Cate Blanchett in Armani Prive

Cate Blanchett at the Front Row of Armani Prive fashion show in Paris.

Love the bold color on her pale skin. The skirt needs a little hemming and the earrings are a little too striking but other than that, she's working this look. Plus this is like some sorta comeback for her because she have been sporting some seriously hideous looks lately.

Olivia Palermo in Valentino Couture

Olivia Wilde at one of the Fashion Week event.

Again, bold dress and bold accessories. Really love it when this two terms can work together because when they do, it just spells FABULOUS. One of my favorite too for this month.

Katy Perry in The Blonds

Katy Perry at The Smurfs 3D premiere in NYC.

Because nobody can work a Smurfette dress like Katy Perry did.

Catherine of Cambridge in Alexander Mcqueen

Kate Middleton at the BAFTA Brits To Watch event in LA.

Well I didn't have the chance to cover this one. One of my favorite too, I love how the soft color of lilac kinda complement the softness of the fabric of the dress. I feel breezy just looking at it. And to not makes her appearance looks washed out, she pair it with a striking silver clutch and glamorous, royal-ish jeweleries.

Sarah Jessica Parker in Mary Mcfadden

Sarah Jessica Parker at the Artistry On Ice Shanghai press conference.

Fabulous dress, nice, interesting design, striking colors, fierce heels and fabulous self. I have no complaints.

Well that's it for this month guys. Till next time!

Fashion: July's Fashion Rundown

Since I'm now in a good mood and it's already the end of the last week of July, lets do a fashion rundown (before we get to the best).

Hillary Swank in Hugo Boss at the Hugo Boss fashion show in Berlin.

I love the pop of red on the nude dress. I also love that the black and red of her dress kinda complement the wall behind her. Hate the heels though.

Leslie Bibb in Prabal Gurung at the LA premiere of Zookeeper.

Super love the top. But I do have some issues with the hemming of the skirt though.

Olivia Palermo in Valentino Haute Couture at the Fashion Week in Paris.

Risk taking = super fabulous. Love the dress and I super love it that she didn't play it safe with the accessories but at the same time, it works. Well, not really sure about that furry creature she's holding, I'm talking about her necklace. Perfectly done. And she's gorgeous.

Olivia Palermo in DKNY at the DKNY Sun Soiree Event

And for this look, she plays with colors. Well I kinda hate the heels but she wears'em for a cause so I'm not going to be all too bitchy about it. I love the pop of pink but I wish it's a tad darker in shade. Other than that, perfection with a capital P.

Christina Aguilera in Givenchy to promote her fragrance in Munich.

Not her winning look but this is waaaaaaaaay better than what she have been wearing all this while.

Clemence Poesy in Chanel at the Paris premiere of HP7.

She can work a dress made of used toilet rolls but she herself look like a terrible mess. Terrible choice of heels though. You know, that's what interesting about this whole look. It's workable but she doesn't look like she's even trying.

Sarah Jessica Parker in Oscar De La Renta dress and Salvatore Ferragamo blazer at the NYC premiere of HP7.

I'm not sure if I like her heels. Other than that, this look just spelled S-J-P. Including that rucksack. Nicely done.

Kyra Sedgwick in Zac Posen at the taping of the Late Night Show With David Letterman.

That dress itself is a terrible mess.

Nicole Kidman in Elie Saab at the NYC screening of the Snow Flower and The Secret Fan.

I don't have many comments on this one. It's quite perfectly done but a little too safe at the same time. And that heels are one very I-don't-know-what-you're-thinking choice.

Rose Byrne in Zimmerman at the Zimmerman Resort Collection dinner in LA.

This is not a way to pull off a shapeless dress. It's too long it almost look gunny-sack-ish. Love the detail on the dress but pairing a complicated dress with a complicated heels is not a smart choice. And the hair needs to be re-done.

Zoe Saldana in Chloe at the Foundation Polo Challenge.

There's something very Cuban high tea party in the late 40s about this look. I really love it. But this is a situation where a random pop of color is not very needed. Ditch that blue bracelet and she's good to go.

Camilla Belle in Dolce & Gabbana at the Real Madrid FC Meet and Greet event.

I can detect those hideous Miu Miu heels from miles away. Ugh. Anyway, she look pretty as always. Credits have to be given for her because it's not easy to pull off a loose-fitting dress with fur.

Jaime King in Valentino, hosting the Stand Up To Cancer Benefits event.

It kinda remind me of something Kate Bosworth wears to the 2010 MET Gala. Well, it looks pretty on her. The sheerness is a little bit intolerable though.

Miranda Kerr in LOVER at the opening of David Jones's store in Sidney, Australia.

This is the shorter version of the original version of the dress, which is way better. I don't like the sheerness in the bust part though. Rather than showing of her nude bra, I'd prefer more if she just go with a nude underlay. Super love those heels. Fierce!

Olivia Wilde in Emporio Armani at a Nylon Magazine bash.

I kinda love this funky look with a touch of glam but I'm not sure if lace boots is the way to go. I'm not sure if lace boots can actually go with anything.

Dita Von Teese in Vintage at the launch of the Cointreau MargaDita Cocktail.

I don't care about you who don't know Dita. Because in her world, this is a drop dead fabulous with a sweet taste of perfection.

Piper Perabo in LA.

And we end our fashion rundown with Piper here, who looks as if she have been ironing her dress with a steamroller. While she's wearing'em.

Fashion: Freida Pinto in Juan Carlos Obando

Freida Pinto wears something and here we are to discuss (and of course, to bitch around) about it.

Freida Pinto in Juan Carlos Obando at the LA premiere of 'The Rise Of The Planet Of Apes'

So what are we waiting for? Lets discuss!

Lets first look at the not-so-bright side (the dark side?). The front part, or more specifically, the bust part of the dress. It's so... droopy. But I don't think that's too much of a problem here. I mean, I don't want to comment her boobs but I should say her bust part can really pull off that droopy-ness quite well.

 And I really love how the color of the dress really suits her skin tone.

And I think I can smell James Franco's hair from here. Moving on.

And the back part of the dress I don't like - the starting point of the asymmetrical-ity of the hem. I hate it. It's too random. It's like the designer originally intended to make this a floor-length dress but suddenly change his mind and took a scissors and started cutting it up to a point where his assistant have to come up to him and say "Enough for today. Why don't you go back and take some rest?"

And from the closed-up look, this actually looks kinda cheap. Maybe because it's too colorful. And it also look like it's missing a few stones there.

Anyway, lets move on the good part here. Makeup and hair: FABULOUS.

"What with hating the melting boobs guys? Lets look at the bright side, ey man? Sexyback and straps! How gorgeous raaaaaaaaayyyyyyyte?"

And I super love this shot. The wind is really on her side. She looks fabulous. This photo should be used as a presentation of the dress. She's selling the shit out of it!

But then again, it come to this one point.

She's working that dress like it owes her a thousand bucks. Yup it's not a very pretty dress but then again, I don't know anyone who can work, and look fabulous and happy at the same time wearing a dress that's hard to pull off. Brava for the attitude, Freida. I'm going to give this a pass.

Fashion: Rachel Weisz

I don't remember watching any Rachel Weisz's movie, except for The Mummy (don't ask. I was a kid at that time) but I'm pretty sure I'll love her in the movie..

..as much as I love her dresses choice.

I mean, how forty and friggin' fabulous is that? I love love love that dress on her and I don't see anyone else who can work the shit off this leather dress. And I love how those sunnies gives her a touch of diva-ness.

And then she attends the NYC screening of her movie, Whistleblowers.

Rachel Weisz in Valentino at the screening of Whistleblowers in NYC.

Again, she oozes fabulousness in her red carpet choice. Those wavy curls and soft makeups and accessories (those earrings are a quite questionable choice though) are really working with this dress. And I love the way she wear the shoulders like that and not off-the-shoulder way as the model wear it. It'll look awfully sloppy and even on the model it looks all "I'm a sloppy spoilt brat craving for my candies and lollipops".

A job well done, Rachel. This one is a total FAB.

Fashion: The Smurfs 3D NYC Premiere

Seriously, who watch Smurfs anymore? I mean, I know they are popular back in the (according to Wikipedia) 80s but people who watched the cartoon series, who's supposedly, like, eight or ten years old back then, haven't they all moved on and stuff already? I mean, it's the Smurfs, not X-Men or, say, Scooby Doo or something. Anyway.

Plus, I don't think people in their 30s will enjoy the 3D experience. Heck the last time I watch a movie in 3D, which is the final Harry Potter movie, the only thing that popped out in front of my eyes is the exit signs. It's sooo... inviting. Oh and there are some stars too. Thank God the movie was good. Anyway.

We're not talking movie critics here, guys. Lets talk fashion. So The Smurfs makes their first appearance to the world after almost 30 years hiding in the enchanted forest - in 3D, no less. And which celeb came out to give their supports to these cute, blue creature, and most importantly, who looks fab doing so?

Lets judge!

Olivia Palermo

Oh this is bad. Honey, you're Olivia Palermo, the most fabulous living creature who's not an actress or singer (she worked in the fashion industry) that ever runs the red (or blue, whatever) carpet but look at you now. We can see your bra and panties, and your tops (I know she did that on purpose, which makes it kinda worse) makes your whole look looks sloppy and most importantly - no colors - which just add more to the sloppiness.

Love your clutch though. xoxo

Sofia Vergara in Missoni

This whole looks kinda screams 'Bollywood' with the striking color, sequins and those over-the-top accessories, which is good IF you're performing on a stage or if you're a, well, Bollywood star. But when you wear all these to an American movie premiere, on a blue carpet, it just screams 'TACKY'.

Your face still looks gorgeous though. xoxo

Jayma Mays in Reem Arca

Poor gal. Those dresses are too short and she was all like "I'm gonna keep these legs clamped shut trough out this whole red carpet event. No panties flashing for you today paps. Geez I hope my buttcheeks aren't showing too."

But enough with that. Lets talk about the dress. I love it. It have colors and although it's a wee bit too shiny and short, I still think it's a pretty dress. And I also love how her heels gives a little pop of color but still matches the embroideries on the dress.

And then lets talk about her. What with that hair? I know it's not a terrible hairdo or anything but it does look a little severe on her. I love her more with the soft curls. And orange lipstick honey? Seriously? First, it doesn't look pretty on her and second, it clashes with the greens of the dress.

Katy Perry in The Blonds

And Katy was like, "This is how it's done, bitchess!!" Okay maybe not for everyone. But.


If The Smurfs was big in, like, the 50s, this would be the perfect dress for a pin-ups poster don't you think so? Anyway, I really love this dress on her. It's so 'Katy Perry at The Smurfs movie premiere where she's one of the main voice-star in the movie'. It's perfect. It's Katy Perry. Nuff' said.

But necks up she looks like a cheap Vegas showgirl who had just spend the whole nights drinking alcohol while exchanging makeup tips with Ke$ha.

xoxo